There are things, like the harp that plays in my mind, which cannot be taken away. I can only remember a few phone numbers at once, and once I’ve learned one, it is a hard time to forget. This time it really will be. But, I’m trying to be good, trying to think of the good things. You know, I have learned some things, like that I can actually have such a desire to watch over another person. I didn’t know I had this sort of good stuff in me. I remember things and it is hard to remember, and it is also hard not to. It is difficult, that everything worth anything is a catch-22. I used to write everything down. Now I just dry heave. To my surprise, upset is not very linear— little things like that I don’t even have photographs from the rodeo. I don’t have a map for this. I can’t make a schedule. Neither of us can vitiate each other any longer. Only to myself now. If I’ve learned nothing else, humans are indeed valuable.